Daily Life Dating A Chemotherapy Instead Of A Human.

Nov 28, 2019

Wait, I got a new complain. This is how daily life thinking about a chemotherapy looks like. When you tasted the joys of being in a couple, I must say I feel forever in debt.

As you know now, this blog became strictly nonfiction. That’s because people are tired of fantasising and they need realism to survive. Isn’t it the ultimate goal of humanity? What if we could make the children speak?

The child is back and the dream is back: but why do the clouds are white and sometimes black? Do you think the fastest to conquer space will win?

A child is patient and he/she knows there’s work to do. You gotta make it for yourself and for others. Anyway, needless to say the chemotherapy is a strange drug. You feel it in your bones and you’re paying the price for being stupid, naive and unreachable.

At First I Got Rid Of It In A Couple Of Days.

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When I was 17 years old, I got a taste of the chemotherapy. The name is Accutane and the drug was recycled to treat severe acne vulgaris. In other words, your uncles are furious for a reason.

Do you know your UNKL point? It’s the point when you stop playing. We’re not talking about austerity when you only take the high percentage shot.

As the Eagles once sang, “you don’t wanna play, you might as well quit”. But how come at 17 I managed to get rid of that drug quickly and now I’m 39 years old I can’t move?

It seems with time you will have more and more trouble getting over troubles and pressure. Life is an extreme experience since you’re born and solidarity is the key for survival. Why did some Israeli leaders hailed competition then?

It’s Like You’re Intoxicated Or Poisoned With Something.

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Intoxication — or poisoning, especially by an alcoholic or narcotic substance — may refer to several things but here I’m going to quote a Serge Gainsbourg song:

  • you see rose elephants everywhere or maybe lymphatic people,
  • you see spiders and you wonder how you fell into this drug trap,
  • you also see bats and think about darkness, malevolence, witchcraft, vampires, and death.

Ok, that was the nice part and here comes the bad part:

  • your words won’t come out right and you’re stuck with the sound of silence,
  • most importantly, love is of no interest to you anymore and you wonder why you’re single.

Yes, daily life with a chemotherapy most dreadful collateral damage is simple: you will spend your life alone with no partners. Ok, maybe you can rely a little bit on some friends or acquaintances. But this world’s only sweet moment will be forbidden for you.

Trying To Tell Shut Up To The Disease Is A Strategy.

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With drugs, the strategy is simple: you suppress the pain hoping that thinking about something else will allow you to enjoy life again. The problem is that time isn’t an arrow; time is a boomerang and it killed some people.

This feeling inside isn’t funny at all. It’s like they’re punishing you for being bold as love or life. One of the basic advice I get from my writing software is simple: be bold, don’t hedge.

When I was young, I was sometimes trying to show some audacity. For example, I managed to drive a car at age 18. I also managed to trust the Maya prophecy which was emphasising the fact our resources aren’t unlimited.

The planet is alive and that’s a good news. In those times where your only love is a drug that makes water useless, we need the audacity of hope like Barack Obama used to write.

Laugh And Run Away Like A Child At Play.

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As a conclusion, someone might feel guilty spending his days with a chemotherapy. The feeling of guilt is related to a standard. People who wrote a business plan know a lot about standards. Maybe jazzmen also know a little about standards.

By the way, the title of that paragraph is taken from a song called “The Days of Wine and Roses”. It’s a jazz standard and if you know it, it will open the door to a wonderful world when you will be seldom disappointed.

Daily life with a chemotherapy is simple: every day is an intimate disappointment. But maybe if we can think there’s no crisis, find our inner bitch back and remember children have a natural sense of God’s mystery, then this drug might be like all others.

This drug might be an awful direction to reach your destination. You will arrive late and your clothes will be stained with something. But I guess there’s some upside: you got a destination.

Nicolas Sursock

Nicolas is a musician. His work now focuses on digesting 10000 songs of jazz, blues, soul, rock, funk and electronic. He plays the guitar if he's not blogging!